And then.....I left.

 Canada –The end, the night I left. 

It was the Labor Day weekend in September. We had planned to spend the weekend together, but then he got called into work. So I made arrangements to see my boyfriend. I was going to see him on Saturday, stay over and come home Sunday. We would then spend Sunday and Monday together. The Friday night, he begged me to change my plans and not go. I had already said that I would never cancel last minute, and if he wanted me to change my plans, then a few days' notice was needed. It was a habit of his to demand that I cancel at the last minute, sometimes as I walked out the door, didn’t matter who I was seeing. I put my foot down and said no. He yelled, made comments like “now I know where your priorities are, who you value more” my reply was simple “yes, me!” and he cried lots, all tricks I had begun to wise up to. I still said no. 

Saturday morning I left to go see my boyfriend. I texted him when I got there so he knew I was safe and got a lovely text back saying have fun. The weekend was amazing. When I left Sunday, I had texted to say I was stopping at my other friend as I had something for her, this was ok and allowed. I finally got home about eleven at night, I had stayed longer than planned with my friends as we got chatting. She texted to say it was her fault and I was on the way home. When I got in, he was in bed. I tried to be quiet, but he turned the light on and laid into me, yelling and screaming about how dare I be out so long, what right did I have to ignore him, and other comments. 

I broke. I sat on the bed and told him I was done and I was leaving. As I packed up some things, he kept yelling, how can it be over? I didn’t say it could be over! Fine, pack and leave whore. What more can I do to keep you here when you don’t want to be? 

His words washed over me as I packed and left. I went back to my friend's house while I tried to reach my parents. I was going to move back in with them. I told my friend what had happened, but she already knew as he was harassing her by text as I was leaving. The texts to her were not nice and certainly not friendly. I had also texted my boyfriend to say I had finally left him. He wanted to ensure I was ok and offered me a place to stay. I said no, but I would see him the next day if that was ok. 

I finally ended up at my parents' house by one in the morning. We talked for a bit and I realized that I was not upset or devastated. I wasn’t angry or hurt. I was happy. I felt a weight lift off my shoulders, and I slept so well that night, better than I had for months. I went and spent Monday with my boyfriend and his wife, we had a fantastic day. It was happy and filled with love. I took a few days off work to try and figure out what I needed to do. There was a lot to consider, but I knew I was not and could not go back to him, not under any circumstances. I did go back to the house on Tuesday to get the dog and more clothes and personal items. I asked him not to be there, but he was. He did stay out of my way as my sister was with me. But I knew he wanted to talk and try to get me back again. It was a few days later that the texts started. “we need to talk, even if this really is the end, we should talk” “I'm trying to give you space, but this is ridiculous” “come home, this is where you should be, not anywhere else” etc. Etc. I wouldn't let him get to me, I was civil in my replies, and asked him to stop. Then I just started to ignore them. 

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